Frequently Asked Questions

“Our fellowship is open to women and men, regardless of age, race, religion, ethnic background, marital status, or occupation. We welcome members of any sexual identity or orientation, whether they are gay, lesbian, straight, bisexual, or transgender.”

Sex Addicts Anonymous, p. 1-2

What is sobriety in SAA?

“Abstinence does not mean giving up sex. That is celibacy. ...We don't give up our healthy sexual expressions; we give up acting-out: compulsive, painful and destructive behaviors.”

Sex Addicts Anonymous, p. 3

In SAA, we have no rigid or absolute definition of abstinence. Each of us defines our own abstinence by determining, with the help of our sponsors and our support systems, what we should consider as our own acting-out behaviors. When we have identified these behaviors, we measure our abstinence (or sobriety) in terms of refraining from these specific activities.

What if I am attracted to other people at meetings?

Feelings of attraction can happen in many circumstances. Many of us have found ourselves attracted to others at one time or another. However, just because we feel attraction, we do not have to act on those feelings. We share our feelings with those we trust. With the support of our group, our sponsors, and our Higher Power we can get through these feelings and even learn from them.

Will I be the only woman at the meeting?

This is a possibility, but not a certainty. There are many women in our fellowship worldwide. This does not necessarily mean that there will be other women in any particular local meeting.

If you feel awkward as the only woman in a meeting, you may choose to attend telemeetings as an alternative. You may also email Grace at for information about how to contact other women.

Be aware that regardless of the number of women you meet in your local group, sobriety is possible through working the SAA program.

What about hugs and physical contact?

Physical contact, including hugs and handshakes, is a personal choice. You have the right to refuse physical contact with another member. You may say, "I am uncomfortable with hugging." Or something similar to that. Remember also that others have the right to say no to hugs or handshakes.

In the SAA program, we learn new ways of thinking and living, and choosing or refusing physical touch is part of that learning process.

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Confidentiality Statement “Be advised that under Texas State law, disclosures of abuse or neglect of minors must be reported to the authorities. SAA staff can provide more information on reporting and disclosure issues.”

The 12 Steps

  1. We admitted we were powerless over addictive sexual behavior - that our lives had become unmanageable.
  2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
  3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God.
  4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
  5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
  6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
  7. Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.
  8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
  9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
  10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
  11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out.
  12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other sex addicts and to practice these principles in our lives.

The 12 Traditions

  1. Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon S.A.A. unity.
  2. For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority — a loving God as expressed in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.
  3. The only requirement for S.A.A. membership is a desire to stop addictive sexual behavior.
  4. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or S.A.A. as a whole.
  5. Each group has but one primary purpose — to carry its message to the sex addict who still suffers.
  6. An S.A.A. group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the S.A.A. name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property, and prestige divert us from our primary purpose.
  7. Every S.A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.
  8. Sex Addicts Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers.
  9. S.A.A., as such, ought never be organized, but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.
  10. Sex Addicts Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence the S.A.A. name ought never be drawn into public controversy.
  11. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, TV, and films.
  12. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.